Sometimes it is good to have a change from the normal way of life so maybe it can also be good to have a change from the normal style of blog post. Anyway, just for fun, I wrote a little story:
Once upon a time, time being the operative word here and implied frequency being neither relevant not accurate, there was a magician’s hat that had become disconnected from its rightful surroundings.
Now, as every good white rabbit knows, the hat is to the time machine what the starter motor is to the car, or, dare I say it, the power supply to the computer. So when the machine lost its hat, some very strange things started to happen to time. The sun disappeared from Yorkshire and turned up a few counties further south and the relationship between plastic cards and the infuriating devices designed to read them took some bizarre turns.
Certain secret time detectives were hot on the trail and quickly agreed the identity of the two chief suspects. But they had gone into hiding.
The observant among you will have noticed that this tale is told in the past tense. That is the most readable way in which to relate a story but, if accuracy of reporting is to triumph over the art of storytelling, then I need to include one of those explanations where people say that they have written ‘he’ when they just as likely mean ‘she’ or ‘it ‘because they think it is clumsy to keep saying ‘s/he’. For some reason they never explain the omission of a possible contraction of ‘she’ and ‘it .
In this instance, of course, ‘was’ could just as easily mean ‘is’ or ‘will be’, ‘has been’ , ‘shall be’ , ‘had been ‘, ‘is going to be’, ‘had been going to be’ or whatever. When Time has lost its hat, we just don’t know where we are.
What’s that? You thought it was the machine, not time, that lost the hat? Yes, of course it’s the machine. The machine is called Time. We are travelling in the machine; at least, we would be if it weren’t for the fact that the hat is lost and Time is stuck in time. And we ‘re stuck with it.
Now, this is about where boredom kicks in and you all stop reading; after all, it’s obvious that white rabbit is going to find the hat and restore it to its proper place. But where will that have been going to have been?
Do you find, like me, that fun is the one element in rather short supply in an otherwise well balanced life?